Sorry for the inconvenience of having my blog be "private" for the week. Ross and I are going through a custody battle with Ian's Mother (Ian is my step son) and we had court this week. Without going too into detail, the issue has not been resolved and we are choosing to deal with it privately until a final decision is made. (Decemberish). I don't think I write about anything inappropriate in my blogs, however I choose to not have any information out there for anyone to tear apart and change things around I have said. My health has already been brought up in court and although I feel that is irrelevant in this case, I am taking pre-cautions because I know how lawyers can change things and rip you to shreds. My running blog will become public again as I haven't really been writting in it and if they want to rip apart that I workout and run, then they should go for it. However, my health is very confidential and should not be open for debate in the court of law.
After being sick for two weeks I think I'm almost 100% better. It all started with me having the worst migraine ever for 4 days in a row. Bless your heart if you can handle a migraine for two days, but FOUR?! Finally, after losing 6lbs, missing days of work, and being in bed for days in a row I told Ross that we had to go to the ER. I thought that something was seriously wrong. When I got admitted they did the first thing I wanted them to do...CT Scan. Thankfully the things they were checking for: meningitis, brain tumor, and brain aneurysm all checked out negative. Praise the Lord!!! They then gave me some iv's of fluids and medication and I was sent home.
The next day I started getting a sharp pain in my stomach. After a few days of that, and the headache was still there, I went back to the doctor for some more tests. They did an ultrasound to check my stomach for what was causing the pain and again, found nothing! They were mainly focusing on my liver as this is where the pain was steeming from. I was really anxious about it wondering if Lupus has now choosen to try to take yet another organ of mine. They did some lab work and that turned out great too! I'm in the "mysterious diagnosis" bucket I guess!! Everyday the pain is getting better.
I'm thinking most of it has been stress induced. Stress can do crazy things to your body and it would be an understatement to say I am stressed. I'm feeling better though just waiting for the rest of this headache to go away and the minor pain I have in my stomach to go away also! I have really been focusing on giving my stress to the Lord and having him take care of it for me. In fact, just a few days ago I prayed for the Lord to take this custody battle stress away from me so I can get healthy again and to accept whatever decision was to be made. I went to bed and woke up feeling like a ton of bricks was off my shoulders. The anxiety and anger were all taken away from me and I felt like I was ready to take on the world. It is a feeling that I cannot even start to explain but I know that God is feeling my stresses right now and that has immensly helped me get better.
Well that's my update on where I have been and how I've been feeling! Thanks for all the emails and messages of concerns. I wasn't trying to worry people this week, just really needed some extra prayers. If we could stay on your prayer list the next few months that would be appreciated. We have a few long, stressful and emotional months ahead of us. Though I feel like both Ross & I have dealt with this together extreamly well, you have to imagine it is also extreamly hard on our marriage. I pray this makes us stronger in the end and accepting it as just another "bump" in the road.
I will end with The Serenity Prayer that I have been living by these last few weeks:
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His will
That I may be resonably happy in this life and
suppremely happy with Him forever in the next.
Amen.
2 comments:
I obviously can't imagine what this is like for you, your son, or your marriage; but I have seen my sister through this rollercoaster twice before. While no one can predict the outcome, I hope you know that you are both wonderful parents, and I hope that the court agrees. I know you have a wonderful support system and lots of faith, and I think that's what gets people through things like this. Our prayers are with you all!
~Dawn
Hang in there dear! I can't imagine dealing with your physical struggles on top of all of the emotional stress that this court case has brought on. You, Ross, and the boys will be in our prayers for the months ahead. God is good and He'll get you through this "bump" in the road as you call it. Praying everyday that your marriage will be strengthened and that your pain will go away.
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